Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Firstly for starters I'd like to address those who'd say 'Arre, Dhoni ne toh paisa kama liya, usko kya farak padta hai.. ' Boss, everyone knows cricket in India is a passion, is a religion and is grossly commercialized even at the expense of other sports and sportspersons. But having said that, there is no way one can take away credit from those guys who are playing cricket in India. So, if you're jealous of the money they're getting, why don't you go play cricket? But saying that playing cricket is easy money is undermining the toil, effort and struggle gone into the making of each and every sportsperson that comes from the gullies of India. Hence, respect every sportsperson, be it a cricketer or someone else. I follow cricket, so here I'm writing about it.
Now, what the hell was everyone expecting from Team India? I mean for god's sake, these blokes have been proving themselves for a long time now.. All I remember from last few series is only wins and draws.. hardly any loses! And all of this within a period of months!! How the hell can you thrust matches after matches on them and keep expecting them to win everything under the sun? Many might say, they dint win when it mattered the most. I'm saying, it's alright.. Chill! They still remain one of the topmost teams to beat, a team that every other cricketing nation fears.. and till the time that hasn't changed, I don't see why the support given to MSD and the Team India should.
Talking about Dhoni, the poor guy has undergone a hell lot of a grind. Yes, so he had his differences with Sehwag, which the media, very kindly blew out of proportion. Believe it or not, this was a big distraction for team India fans, forget the Team India itself! I am not saying media shouldn't have reported this, but the way this analysis, of Dhoni's every statement went on was pretty much 'i-got-fodder-for-next-10-days' matter. Secondly, the only few mistakes he made were in the crucial game against England. Yes, those were bloody stupid and crappy mistakes.. and probably political too? Who knows? But the guy admitted having made those mistakes, took full responsibility of the same and pledged improvement. What more can he do? (even assuming 'usko promise karne mai kya jaata hai', still, what more can he do?). Suddenly media comes up with dubious headlines like 'Dhoni's dream run is over?' 'Captain cool is uncool?' I mean what bull shit! I believe Dhoni and his team's dream run is very much on! I tell you why? The guy is someone who's come up the hard way. He has taken up captancy under very tense circumstances and has built this younger team (and even lead it to win T20 worldcup) without any Tendulkar-like record breaking match winning players at disposal. In fact, he himself remains the No.1 batsman on ICC rankings due to his ability to finish matches. Dhoni is a kind of person who learns from mistakes and rectifies them. He is the kind of player who will experiment against majority. And when you take risks, it's either rewards or brickbats.
I think it's too early to write off this Indian Team. I have full faith in each and every player. In fact im appalled at the thought that they've got a series coming up in the next 10 days!!! I just hope the boys go out there and shut up these useless experts who (expectedly) crown you the moment you win and drown you the moment you lose! Go get em!
Monday, April 27, 2009
The result is that I've stopped enjoying happy moments. In fact, I am actually scared of them. It's not that I am not prepared to face what comes next. But I just lose value of the happiness that surrounds me in the present. It is like this glass that is sure to break. It is like this dream which once you see, will make sure it will never become a reality. I tried discarding this feeling as a mental block. But you see, experience makes my case stronger. Ofcourse it also reinforces the old adage that 'After every bad, there is good' and vice versa. Hence I am really confused what to do.. I try to enjoy my happiness, but most often end up not taking it seriously. It's like 'What's in it to be so happy about? It's going to turn into something bad anyways'.
I know its a negative and a really bad cycle of thought.. I sometimes curse myself for it.. But I just dont know what to do.. Enjoy the moment and perhaps take strength from it to face the hurt? Too idealistic. Any suggestions?
Friday, March 27, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
Friday, March 6, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
Where I turn into You…
I know I am not alone.
And yet I feel away..
Placed where the rays of the sun turn into a speckle,
Placed where the strong winds sway..
And as I walk a mile,
My face breaks into a watery smile..
As I look back to the horizon, and bade good bye,
As I look ahead up the hill, and walk, teary-eyed.
I am walking, but not moving ahead..
I am missing. But not being searched for yet.
When time plays a game, all is lost.
It hides into the depth of circumstances,
When u need it the most.
Blink of an eye, and the familiar is gone,
What you once wished, turns into a regret soon..
In a crowd, you go to seek some peace,
When alone, you simply pay the price.
There’s never enough for anyone out there,
Just one familiar word is a surprise.
But as you go along, the path full of rubble,
You realize you get strong, the more you face the trouble…
Unfortunate are those, who’ve never failed in life,
Who think succeeding is cool, cool enough to boast in pride.
Toughest steel comes out of sweltering fire,
Calmest are those, whose minds burn with desire.
Coolest are those, who pass the test of the pyre..
And Humble are those, who never see themselves any higher..
There’s a lot, unsaid within me,
Every time I try to tell you,
You escape it so easily.
When I don’t expect, you make me do,
And make me feel so special,
I feel like a dream, so wonderful,
So happy and so real!
One moment, you understand me,
The next moment, you shut,
The doors that make me wanna come to you,
From the other side are locked.
You will never know how special you are,
I amnt a fool to tell,
This gap between us will remain filled,
With all those things unsaid…
Was just wondering how sixth sense works. And probably here in terms of friendships. It so often happens that you’re lost, sad, super depressed and someone out of the blue has asked you, ‘are you okay?’ and you wonder for a moment! How?? I tried my best to hide it so I guess my face dint show, I tried my best not to sulk so I guess my behaviour dint show. But then HOW? How did my friend come to know?
I’ve been caught up in that question for a number of times. Ok, face to face may be one can make out by the vibes you give out whether you are fine or not. But when it happens online, it’s all the more astonishing! My close friend has this knack. At times, even before I say a hello, he’s asked me, ‘what’s wrong with you? You’re not fine’ and I stare at the screen for a few surprised moments before I can actually reply. How the hell did he know? I guess some people know you just too well or have some super power sixth sense? What is it? While some do have sixth sense, some are awesome observers! I had a really bad phase in personal life during college. And a friend with whom I dint even converse like 2 words a day noticed it. And it’s he who came to my rescue and to whom I could pour my heart out completely unabashed. It was this brief phase of friendship which was so short-lived but yet cent percent pure and genuine.. Some people like these are just fairy-godmothers sent to you from the heaven above! But my point remains.. what is it about friendship? About humans? About feelings that is so transparent even as we try to make it opaque. It scares me at times. Makes me feel I am lagging behind in that department coz I cant make out or pin point depressions of people for nuts! Even if I do, I am really weary of approaching them and talking to them about personal stuff coz I feel in such times you choose your aid very carefully espl when it comes to revealing the reason behind your moods. And I don’t think I’d fit in or deserve that role anyway and to top it all, people tend to get suspicious of you interfering and irritating.
But sigh. When friends do that to me, I feel special. I feel good. I feel there’s a ray of hope where in this noisy crabby world, a lot can still be felt and said without much effort J touchwood.
A story of silence
I sat there, alone in the crowded classroom. There was so much noise around, but it all seemed like a distant buzz to my ears. There was so much movement around me, so many people preparing for presentations. Some rehearsing their speeches, others setting up the projector, the rest chattering amongst themselves. But they all appeared like blurred dots to me. I had taken off my specks and laid my head down on the bench. No one bothered me. ‘The presentation is about to begin.’ A clear voice rang through my ears. I upped my head by barely an inch above the desk to look who spoke. It was the teacher announcing the commencement of the next presentation. I stared at the blurred outline of an old cupboard lying in our classroom. There was movement around. But it dint bother me. I kept staring like an idiot. It took me a while before I could register some vivid movement out there. Near the cupboard I mean. Someone was franctically waving out to me. My pupils contracted as I carefully looked in that direction. It was this classmate of mine whom I must’ve not even exchanged 10 words ever since I stepped into college. I looked up a bit and unsurely pointed out a finger to myself to indicate ‘who me?’. He nodded with a charming smile on his face. He continued to wave until I waved back with a faint trace of smile on my face. Why he did that, I had no clue. But I could guess he spotted silence in the commotion. A while later he came to me and said, ‘hey, will you be there to see my play tomorrow?’ ‘Me?’ I asked again, stupidly. ‘Yes, you.’ He replied calmly. ‘Umm.. ok. Sure.’ I replied, still, stupidly. ‘Tomorrow. Be there to see it. Ok?’ he said and left me aghast. I went back home, admittedly, smiling. Even though I dint know what had happened, I surely recognized the effort to make me feel wanted and to make me feel good. To my pleasant surprise, it wasn’t the end of it all..
I went home and as a habit and a ritual, I signed into MSN messenger. All the nocturnal creatures like me were online. Yes, he was online too. He never spoke to me online either. Never ever since my last two years in college. I just looked at his name out there and smiled. ‘Hi, how are you?’ came a pop-up of a chat window.. And to my pleasant surprise, it was him! ‘Hi! I’m good.’ I replied. ‘But you don’t look so good in college. I have been observing you. You have been very quiet and down lately. What has happened?’ he asked, much to my surprise.. ‘Uhh.. well, a lot is down lately.’ I admitted. ‘If you want, you can tell me. I promise you I wont tell this to anyone. I can be an outlet to your problems. Talk it out.’ He offered instantly. Ok, here was this guy who dint even speak a few sentences with me ever, and yet, and simply yet he had sensed so much that was going around. There are times when you let your heart take over the rationale. By logic I shouldn’t have given a damn to his offer and should have politely refused. But my heart told me he was god sent. He was the outlet I was looking for. An unknown person who’d listen to me, understand me and yet, stay away from me. Without a second of hesitation, I poured out my heart to him. He heard me out patiently. And even gave me some great advice which I remember till date. That night I shed tremendous burden from my mind. It brought back a smile on my face. We never bothered to talk much after that incident.. occasionally when things went low, he did ask. But never much otherwise. But one glance at him and I knew there was someone who cared. Who wanted to be there when I was alone. You mustve come across such people.. They’re special. Extremely special..