Tea tastes bitter after eating a sweet biscuit. Night seems darker after a bright sunny day.. the pain seems doubled when you have just experienced happiness.. I believe in god but feel like renouncing the faith in fairy godmothers or guides or best friends and so on.. Precisely for the reasons above. They're just there for you for that crucial part of your life, they then become a crucial part of your life and then they throw a stone at the mirror in front of you. It cracks and breaks up. You realize, it was just your imagination. They have favoured you and moved on. YOu are supposed to take the favour and move on too! WHAT THE HELL!
I dont think ever in my life have i got a fair chance of doing something for the people who have meant the most to me. They have always been my support, my iron pillars, my reason to smile, and then, all of them literally have moved away to greater avenues, forgetting that they have an indebt soul struggling with the burden of their support.
Now you'd argue, cmon! they're your friends, and anyone wouldve done that. Then I say, hell, if they were really my friends, why do they do good to my life and go away??? I've misunderstood the concept of friendship so far and therefore my faith in it is a bit false.. i feel. I thought friendship is one permanant bond that has survived the test of change. Solid friendship has been as much about longer time and tide than just mere strength of understanding each other. I thought friendship is where people are missed in good times and remembered in bad times.. but SHIT! i was wrong o wat!
My belief in friendships has shaken from its roots. And every passing day it keeps getting worse. People around me are finding time to attend parties, go on picnics, catch up with buddies.. everything but just somehow dont find time to remember a few other insignificant insects. Even today whenever someone tells me 'Drashti, kya tu busy ho gayi hai, you've forgotten me.. blah blah'' i take it as a sign of respect from that person to me and make it a point to revert in the most appropriate manner possible. But i dont think that works with everyone.. many of them still think them being busy with work, home, blah blah is the most valid excuse on earth. And some, better still, let go of the freakin friendship to relieve themselves of the responsibility.
'It's reality! Accept it' many tell me. I feel hurt.. if this is reality, go to hell! Being laughed at for trying to keep in touch, being laughed at for meeting up someone whoze been your classmate for 3 yrs (but HE/SHE was never a close friend of yours na? so y are you meeting up?).. yeahhhh!! go on.. laugh.. And then do i have a choice.. i let go. I will be indebt for life.